How to Not Suck — A Wicked Woman

Something has happened. For any of you that followed my previous blogs, you know that I started off with a bang last year around this time. Burst onto the blogging scene with war cries of “Don’t waste time! Grab life by the balls!” (which is still a worthy philosophy, understand, and very dearly inspired). The problem…

via How to Not Suck — A Wicked Woman

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The Ubiquitous Stiletto Heel


This is not a judgement but my opinion.

The stiletto heal has no redeeming social value.
Consider please that it is named after a slim tapered knife whose only function is for stabbing. A weapon of death.
It seems to be the footwear de rigueur of porn sites and fashion shoots. The  last piece of attire to be shed and often not.

But why? There is nothing inherently sexy about these disfunctional  shoes, impractical in the extreme. I have heard it said that they make a woman’s legs look sexy.  No, they look like an accident waiting to happen as she teeters on the precipice of a great fall. Her feet no longer resembling feet but rather some mutant aberration designed to inflict painful joint deformities.  The stiletto heel is reminiscent of the Chinese foot binding, a gender specific destructive
practice in search of some false beauty standard.

Even if we are to somehow strech our imaginations to encompass these so-called shoes as sexy we are still left with the physical implications of their design.  For this discussion let us assume the heel dimension at the point of floor contact to be a square of 0.5 inches per side. This gives us a surface mating area of 0.25 square inches. Let us further assume that the wearer of the shoe weighs 120 pounds and that during the normal course of walking and movement there will be times when all of her weight is concentrated upon 1 heel.  The force of 120 pounds per 0.25 square inch is the equivalent of 480 pounds per square inch and (times 144) 34.56 tons per square foot.

Now I do not know about you folks but I do not want 34.56 tons per square foot of pressure applied to my hardwood floors. That damnable heel will stretch the finish causing microcracks resulting in the loss of sheen and will compress the wood fibers resulting in permanent dents. Yes, this is a real problem.  see here

If the flooring can be damaged I shudder when thinking of what can happen to textiles. Just imagine that pressure applied to the fine cotton sheets of your bed or to the supple leather of your couch. Is a good romp in the hay worth the destruction of your furniture and bedding? Actually, the stiletto may be OK for a true romp in the hay. The heels would pass between the strands of hay causing the wearer to lose her balance and fall upon her ass. At that time she would become frustrated, remove the stupid shoes and throw them away.

Lost Mind

The proliferation of mobile apps is changing the way our minds work.

So a while back I was reading a magazine. You remember them don’t you? Those flat things with slick glossy pages made from real paper. As I was flipping through the pages (flipping –  sort of like swiping but not) I beheld an advertisement that garnered my interest. At the bottom of the aforementioned advertisement was the company’s Web address for more information. In that I was desirous of additional information regarding the availability of the presented product I attempted to click upon the URL. I waited for a few seconds for the company’s home page to load.

At this time let us review my situation. I was READING a magazine.

Yes, I have officially lost it.

The Shower. A Fantasy.

    I arise from the bed, grasping your hand to bring you with me. I am heading for the shower to clean the sweat and funk of our love making from our bodies. My legs are still shaky and weak from the explosive orgasms you drew from me. As I look at you I see evidence of our lust even in your hair.
    The bathroom is luxurious with gleaming metal and marble and large fluffy towels on a heater. The shower is large enough for three giving me thoughts for future encounters.
    I turn to you and wrap you in my arms, pressing my lips to yours, tasting myself upon your mouth, knowing that you are tasting yourself. You draw back with a gentle sigh and a soft giggle. Yes, you feel me growing again.
    I dip my head and draw your areola into my mouth, ever so gently sucking, softly swirling my tongue. I know it is sore and sensitive from the craved abuse early. You begin to moan and slide your hand to my ass to caress me. I feel your nipple begin to stiffen along with my manhood. But alas, that is not why we are here.
    I step away from you and enter the shower to adjust the water, steamy but not too hot. I turn and reach out my hand. You take it and enter to join me. You are so beautiful and sexy. Why am I so blessed to be with you?
    We once again embrace, the water flowing over us, beginning to rinse away the evidence of our lust. I step away, placing you fully under the waterfall. I pour a generous amount of shampoo into my hand and begin to massage it into your hair. It lathers up and I stroke your hair from the crown to the very ends. My fingers gently massage your scalp, I remove from your hair that which I had so eagerly put there this afternoon.  I now help you to rinse away the lather, running my fingers through your hair, repeating with the conditioner.
    There is a luffa sponge available and I pour the creamy shower soap onto it. I begin to scrub your back, not too hard, just enough to make your skin tingle. Across you shoulder and down your back. I gently scrub your butt checks and down you legs. You place your hands on the wall for balance as I raise your foot to scrub the sole and then the other.  I stand and set aside the luffa, pour some soap into my hand and begin to wash the cleft of your ass. I go gently, knowing that you will be sore from our activity earlier. My finger lightly caresses and cleanses you. You softly whimper.
    I withdraw and you stand under the shower to rinse and turn to face me. I now use a washcloth with the soap to begin washing your face, your arms, your breasts, your stomach. Kneeling before you I wash your legs. Finally all that is left to wash is your yoni. Using just my hands I softly lather the small patch of hair you leave. My fingers gently stroke your lips, ever so softly, for they are swollen from the vigor of our joining. You rinse again and as I hug you from behind you feel my hardness pressing upon you. You reach between you legs, pull me down and in one fluid motion impale yourself upon me. You begin to move up and down, small but quick movements. I hold your breast with one hand and with the other I grab the handheld shower unit, turn the valve and direct the pulsating water blasts to your clit. You explode, slamming yourself onto me until you are spent.
    You collapse, still impaled and I hold onto you until you recover and stand. Turning to me, you kiss me and say that it is now my turn.
You mimic what I did to you, the hair, the luffa, the feet, my butt. I turn and you wash my front, finishing with my erect lingam. As I rinse off you do not stand but pull me forward so that you can engulf me with your mouth. I am in ecstasy again. I cannot not believe what is happening, I am exploding again. I have never been with a woman who could bring me have to this many climaxes. I can barely stand as you rise into my arms and we kiss. As we part for our final rinse we sadly look at each other knowing that was the last kiss for today.
    We exit the shower, dry our bodies, dry our hair, brush our teeth and do all the other things needed to restore our appearance. We do not touch again. You cannot risk the possibility of my scent upon you nor can I risk yours upon me. As we leave the room we look longingly at each other, already planning our next meeting.

The Massage. Recollections From a Better Time.

After your stress filled day at work it did not take much to convince you to relax in the hot tub with a glass of mellow red wine. Our conversation was light and playful, we did not turn on the jets, preferring the quiet stillness of a clear winter evening. But we could only take a short time in the heat of the tub and too soon had to retreat into the house.
Now you lie face down upon our bed as I gently rub sweet oil infused with lavender into your soft skin. I stroke you from your shoulders to the soles of your feet and you gladly accept the joy of a gentle massage.
I do not touch you in a provocative manner but let the sensual stroking of your naked body build desire within you. I straddle your thighs so that I can easily use both hands on your back. I am now able to press my weight into the palms of my hands as they slowly slide up your back alongside of your spine to your shoulders. There I massage and knead the muscles to relieve the built up tension.
After a few moments I slide my hands down the sides of your body to your hips and across to your butt. I gently knead you cheeks for just a moment and then glide my hands to the small of your back to repeat the process.
As I straddle your thighs, you are aware of the feel of my skin against yours. My legs pressed against yours, the heat of my crotch on the back of your thighs. You smile to yourself, knowing that although I have not touched you sexually, your nakedness is enflaming my passion. You smile to yourself, knowing that although I have not touched you sexually, my touch is enflaming your passion.
I rise up from your thighs and spread your legs so that I can kneel between them. I now begin to devote my attention to your sexy butt. I press hard with my balled hands into your cheeks using a slight twisting motion, slowing moving from the inside to the outside. My thumbs slide along the crease where your cheeks meet your thighs, from the outside to the inside. My hands form fists again and I repeat the process while you moan in pleasure.
As I finish I slide my hands up to your shoulders and lay flat upon you. You can feel the evidence of my arousal pressing against you and you are pleased. My lips gently kiss the back of your neck. Now I find your earlobe and gently tug it with my teeth and lips. I kiss my way gently back to your neck where your spine meets your hairline.
I begin to slowly kiss and gently nibble my way down your spine.  My hands slide down your body in sync with my mouth. Halfway down your back I touch your skin with the tip of my tongue and slowly slide it back up to your neck.
Now I find your other earlobe and gently tug it with my teeth and lips. I kiss my way gently back to your neck. I again begin to slowly kiss my way down your spine but this time there is no nibbling. Instead, my tongue flicks over your skin with each kiss. My hands again slide down your body in sync with my mouth but this time to the edge where your body meets the bed. My fingers caress the outer parts of your breasts.  Halfway down your back I do not stop this time.
As my lips pass the small of your back I become aware of the intoxicating scent of your arousal. My hands have found your butt and are kneading your cheeks. As my lips reach the top of the cleft of your butt the kisses stop and it is just my tongue touching you. At the very base of your spine I pause as my hands spread you. Your rational mind says ‘stop’ but from your lips escapes a wanton ‘Please!’. I move my tongue lower and you sigh a breathless ‘Yessss!’.

Hello world!

I am using this site to post short stories as the mood may strike me.